Wednesday, October 14, 2009

I Shall Not Die

It is just after 1:30 in the morning as I am beginning the first installment of the I Shall Not Die Blog. This particular online journal is being created primarily to keep me on task with this charge that God has given me to write my first nonfiction ministerial tool, I Shall Not Die. All I can say is that this is turning into a much bigger assignment than I first thought it would be, and any time that we move forward to fulfill the work of God, we can also expect the enemy to do his part to try and produce stumbling blocks along the way. And need I say that he has already begun trying to trip me up.
I wrote my first public thoughts about I Shall Not Die, the pending book, in my Blessed2Write Blog just over a week ago on October 5th, and I won't tell the whole story of this vision and God-ordained charge all over again. But there has been so much spiritual (as in evil spirit) adversity that has come my way already, that I felt compelled to create this blog to keep a record of all of the noteworthy things that may happen en route to fulfilling this assignment.
The full acknowledgement and acceptance of God's will for I Shall Not Die (the book) came shortly before this year's launching of Cruisin' For Christ. I knew long before that that God was ordering me to write the book, but I'd fought it for years. However, at some point in the month of August, I gave up the fight and told the Lord that as soon as I cleared my plate of some of the my current writing and editing deadlines, I would begin this project. Cruisin' For Christ III took place Sept. 5-12, and it was phenomenal! God truly blessed our week long at-sea fellowship, but immediately upon returning home, I learned that while I was away, there had been some suspicious activity on my business account, and as a result, the bank had frozen my account, hindering me from paying any of my outstanding obligations - both personal and business related. I was angry and I was hurt, but I was also determined not to let it throw me so far off course that I failed to honor my vow to the Lord.
Once I got caught up on my literary obligations, I made it a priority to move full steam ahead on I Shall Not Die. On October 5th, the date of my Blessed2Write blog entry, I began writing the book. Meanwhile, I made contact with the company who always designs the covers for the books published through KNB Publications LLC and requested that a cover be immediately designed for this new project so that I could begin promoting it at an event which was scheduled for October 10th. For the first time ever, the graphic designer was too busy to get to my project right away. Orders had her backed up so far that it would be a month before she could begin to work on the cover for I Shall Not Die. In all the years that I've worked with her, she has never needed more than two or three days to get cover samples to me. Coincidence? Maybe. But in my spirit, I felt that a strategically placed stumbling block had been laid in hopes of keeping me from having the cover ready in time. But I wouldn't accept defeat.
After taking a moment to gather my thoughts, God reminded me that He always has a ram in the bush (or in layman's terms, another option). One of my best girlfriends is married to a graphic artist, and althought I'd never had him to design a cover for me before, I sent him an email to see if he would take on the challenge of not only putting together a cover, but getting it done within a few short days. AJ3 Photography accepted my request without a pause, and two days later (half the time that I'd given him) he had sent me about ten cover samples to choose from. The first one I opened (see photo) nailed my unspoken vision with so much perfection that I wept. Because of the nature of this book, it is dearer to my heart than any of my previous writings, and to see how God worked through the graphic artist's hands (without me even giving him the details of what I was envisioning) was overwhelming. But the enemy wasn't finished harrassing me.
Those who know me well, know that I work long and late hours. I generally rise at 9:00 in the morning, and I don't go to bed until 2:30 or 3:00 the next morning. I'm full of energy and well-rested as long as I can get six hours or more of sleep per night. But since I said "Yes" to the Lord and set my sights on getting this particular book written, I can barely keep my eyes open throughout any given day. If there is such a thing as a "sleeping demon" it seems to have found its way to me. Each time I sit down to begin writing on I Shall Not Die, my eyelids become too heavy to fight the sleep, and if I lie down to catch a thirty-minute powernap, it easily turns into three hours of sound sleep. And even then, when I wake up, I'm still tired and groggy. This has been an every day occurence since I began writing the book. Whatever the reasons for all of these bizzare happenings, I am still determined to keep on keeping on. I won't give up. I won't be defeated. I won't be distracted. And I Shall Not Die!
The Women's conference last weekend (the event that I needed the cover image for) turned out wonderfully. Not only did God meet us there at the Clarion Airport Conference Center in Jacksonville, Florida, but he also inspired me to launch a full fledge "I Shall Not Die" ministry that expands beyond the pending book. And today, I sat down at the computer and followed His direction to build an "I Shall Not Die" Website that is specific to this newly birthed ministry. Please click on the link, visit the site, and consider becoming an ISND Vision Partner.
Admittedly, I have no idea where all of this is going to ultimately lead, but I know that as long as I listen to His voice and adhere to His divine instructions, it will be blessed. And I am excited to see how the hands of God will move next.
Stay tuned...

1 comment:

  1. WOW! I'm sitting here reading this blog and I cannot stop the flow of tears from cascading down my face. I'm filled with emotion and a full heart. Know that I prayed before sending this response because I wanted God to hear me, speak to my soul and to let him know how much I appreciate this effort I'm about to embrace with you. Why am I feeling this way? For many years, Kendra I've plied my trade helping others as an editor, book reviewer, publicist in the literary industry; as an educator in the academy, and as Deacon in my church. I'm all about giving and making other people's life worth more that efforts I feel should exemplify better faith initiatives. I too, have been given a task by God to fulfill and have ignored the call...not because I felt I couldn't do it, but rather I felt that I needed more to accomplish more. I procrastinated and continued to give excuses. Then one day, God just got fed up and spoke more vociferously than that 'still small voice' we like to refer to when omniscience is fully in place.

    As a freelance writer and essayist my work has appeared in all forms of literary media for mass appeal, but of late God's will has permeated through my sensibilities to challenge me to extrapolate and enlarge my territory. As I read this entity and gravitated to your 'I Shall Not Die' website that was confirmation enough for me to know that through others His message is manifested through peer-to-peer association. What do I mean by this you may ask? Well, on two occasions I had dreams giving me prompts that one of my friends would want my support for a proactive thrust. The dream stipulated emphatically that this person would be reaching out from situations that allowed her to step up...and that my situation was no different. It's no coincidence that when I woke this morning your e-mail was the first that I opened up, nor is it coincidental that I'm feeling so full of myself as I run to God for prayer extolling his impatience for me to act!

    I will support you in this endeavor Kendra, and will do so in whatever way possible in addition to purchasing the book. As part of this newfound proposition He has given me is to publish a book of my own about giving people a way to rise above brokenness to be made whole again. I plan to do this by identifying symptoms, applying application and finding solutions to everyday problems we face. As you read this I'm writing the book tentatively entitled -- 'Righteous Apples and Other Spiritual Gems''s about leading people to Christ with a different way of interpreting Bible staples. The only thing is finding a publisher and negotiating a deal. I'm confident that He will see me through on this.

    I honestly feel that it's time for me to become more visible and prolific in how I can get the general public to embrace me as a serious writer. I speak as I do while The Romer Review is in hiatus as I concentrate on creating a new online presence to bolster my new direction. But your current project has mesmerized me in a Providential way and I just wanted to let you know my feelings on what you are doing. You and I go quite a ways back and I'm proud to know that someone who has been so special to me over the years has a hand in me getting to that next level. May all of your endeavors in this project and others enhance your blessings. There's quite a few books in me, and I'm not ashamed to admit I want to follow your example. I thank you from the bottom of my heart. Keep me in your prayers and know that YOU are that Angel that God wanted me to look at to propel me anew. I Shall Not Die because there's greater work within me from He that sustains me! Hallelujah!!

    Blessings from down deep,

    Alvin C. Romer
    The Romer Review